Monday, January 17, 2005
Meeting her at last
So I've been emailing with a woman from Match for, oh, between 3 and 4 months. That's right, months. I've never done this before, in the past we usually email back and forth a few times, I offer my phone number, and eventually meet in let's say, 2-3 weeks MAX.
But something about this woman was different. She seemed extremely cautious through the entire process, so I realized I would need to take it slow, and assume that we might never meet at all.
But the conversations became increasingly deep, and lengthly, especially after they turned to subjects of kissing, sex, children, etc. One thing I've learned from joining Match is that there are childfree women out there, and some of them are really pretty cool. This came as a bit of a revelation to me ... after my last girlfriend and I split up (due solely to the fact that she wanted children someday, while I came to the conclusion that I never wanted them) I wasn't sure I'd ever meet a women who embodies all (or most) of the qualities I'm looking for (intelligent, athletic, passionate, educated, and childfree) but those women ARE out there ... they're just fewer and farther between.
So, after many months of emailing, I proposed we meet yesterday, and she agreed. She planned on studying at a Dunn Brothers coffeeshop, and said I could join her after she had a few hours of study under her belt.
So I showed up at 5pm, went upstairs, and there she was. Grey v-neck, pink fingerless gloves (worn while studying - interesting) brunette hair w/some sexy curls in it - over, really looking very good. Perhaps a little more in the hips than I might prefer ( a little "hippy" you might say) but I'm not passing judgement based on that - very attractive face, nice lips, and these deep brown eyes I could imagine losing myself in someday.
Conversation was just slightly awkward at first, but it started flowing nicely in very short order. This woman can tell stories - in fact, I felt at times like I had too little to contribute, but she didn't seem to notice. The only disconcerting thing is that many of her stories seem to have sexuality at their core. Like, almost all of them - it's a little strange. Although, she works at planned parenthood so much of her daily life involves sex and reproduction, so maybe it naturally follows that many of her stories would revolve around that as well. But it seems like she's trying just a little too hard to make that point that she's a sexual being, that men find her very attractive, etc.
A good sign that I enjoyed myself - my face hurt from smiling and laughing so much. Another good sign - we talked for over 4 hours, and probably could have talked longer if the coffeeshop hadn't been closing for the night. We walked downstairs without saying much, I gave her a hug goodnight, and then (the weird part) I asked if I could give her a call, and she said maybe better to email. Don't know if that's a subtle way of saying "nice to meet you, but I'm really not interested". I don't think this is the case, since she seemed to be enjoying herself and certainly would have excused herself at some point, rather than wasting 4+ hours of her time in conversation that would go nowhere - but you never know.
But something about this woman was different. She seemed extremely cautious through the entire process, so I realized I would need to take it slow, and assume that we might never meet at all.
But the conversations became increasingly deep, and lengthly, especially after they turned to subjects of kissing, sex, children, etc. One thing I've learned from joining Match is that there are childfree women out there, and some of them are really pretty cool. This came as a bit of a revelation to me ... after my last girlfriend and I split up (due solely to the fact that she wanted children someday, while I came to the conclusion that I never wanted them) I wasn't sure I'd ever meet a women who embodies all (or most) of the qualities I'm looking for (intelligent, athletic, passionate, educated, and childfree) but those women ARE out there ... they're just fewer and farther between.
So, after many months of emailing, I proposed we meet yesterday, and she agreed. She planned on studying at a Dunn Brothers coffeeshop, and said I could join her after she had a few hours of study under her belt.
So I showed up at 5pm, went upstairs, and there she was. Grey v-neck, pink fingerless gloves (worn while studying - interesting) brunette hair w/some sexy curls in it - over, really looking very good. Perhaps a little more in the hips than I might prefer ( a little "hippy" you might say) but I'm not passing judgement based on that - very attractive face, nice lips, and these deep brown eyes I could imagine losing myself in someday.
Conversation was just slightly awkward at first, but it started flowing nicely in very short order. This woman can tell stories - in fact, I felt at times like I had too little to contribute, but she didn't seem to notice. The only disconcerting thing is that many of her stories seem to have sexuality at their core. Like, almost all of them - it's a little strange. Although, she works at planned parenthood so much of her daily life involves sex and reproduction, so maybe it naturally follows that many of her stories would revolve around that as well. But it seems like she's trying just a little too hard to make that point that she's a sexual being, that men find her very attractive, etc.
A good sign that I enjoyed myself - my face hurt from smiling and laughing so much. Another good sign - we talked for over 4 hours, and probably could have talked longer if the coffeeshop hadn't been closing for the night. We walked downstairs without saying much, I gave her a hug goodnight, and then (the weird part) I asked if I could give her a call, and she said maybe better to email. Don't know if that's a subtle way of saying "nice to meet you, but I'm really not interested". I don't think this is the case, since she seemed to be enjoying herself and certainly would have excused herself at some point, rather than wasting 4+ hours of her time in conversation that would go nowhere - but you never know.
# posted by equipoise @ 9:18 AM 
